Taking some Time

I'm sitting here relaxing a bit - finally able to take a breath.

Had a bit of a hassle when I went to the prison last night - and I only got to see the D-Man for about 5 minutes. Frisking is not all it's made out to be... (visits are supposed to be a half hour long - I suppose if you don't happen to be wearing a hat, bandanna and a tie-dye.)

At least he got to see his daughter. Hope he's alright.

Looks like I'll be getting him out of the slammer soon (I hope... if all goes well).

Got him a lawyer Tuesday, and he's awesome. Calmed me down immensely.

Then I got an extended "line of credit" at the bank - signing the papers next Monday (thank gawd it went through). Then it's off to the Courthouse to pay the lawyer and the first set of fines . With Luck, he'll be transferred, the lawyer will show up and ask for a hearing, and I'll pay the second set of fines (the big ones) at the Courthouse in the next county - and he'll be released in time for the Fourth (please). Brings new meaning for me to the Independence Day thing...

Can't wait to give him a big fat hug and then a good bare-assed licking. I still think that cop had a hard-on for my man. If you'd have seen the smile on his face when he slapped the cuffs on... you'd know what I mean.

Damn this is such a racket it seems.
The charges were dropped years ago on the first warrant, but the fine still has to be paid.

Why?

At The Station

I didn't get to see the Dalai Lama at work today, but I felt a cool sense of calm throughout the day.
I would have loved to catch a glimpse of him, and had I known - I would have stayed a bit longer. I had to meet my Step Mom for lunch, and that was cool. Maybe I'll see him sometime this weekend.

I usually put a post about the radio show over at =CoffeeHouseStudio=, but I thought I'd try one here today. Here goes...

Another absolutely fabulous morning... but a bit hot this afternoon. Oh well, it is June after all.

I exhibited a great amount of restraint this morning, not mentioning the passing of FISA by our fantasic and illustrious Senate - over the airwaves - in fact I steered clear of any and all things political (except for some tunes) but generally speaking one of the 7 words will slip out when I'm giving a passionate speech - so I decided not to give the speech... smooth sailing.

Hoping to catch a view of the Dalai Lama, I went outside and 'snuck' a cigarette during "Reformation Blues"; a copy of which Adrian Shaw (bass) had sent me (he is an ex-bass player of Hawkwind) from a release (Acid Jam 2000) on his record label: Woronzow Records. I must say thank you again, Ade for all the cool tunes - including your solo CDs and The Bevis Frond CDs.

Also got a phone call at the station about cussing... I didn't, but the listener swears that Grace Slick does on "The Son Of Jesus"... I never heard it, and it's not listed in the lyrics. I know that Gracie uses the fabulous "fuck" word from time to time, and we are careful of what we play on air - so I politely disagreed with the caller.

...and now the List:

"SPONTANEOUS APPLE CREATION" - CRAZY WORLD OF ARTHUR BROWN

"THE TELL-TALE HEART" - ALAN PARSONS PROJECT

"BROKEN WINGS" - ATOMIC ROOSTER

"TURN TO DUST" - ANDROMEDA

(*)"HOMICIDE" - 999

"GOOD DAY" - NEKTAR

"FUNK #48" - THE JAMES GANG

"ONE WAY OUT" - ALLMAN BROTHERS (LIVE)

"REFORMATION BLUES" - NICK SALOMAN / ADRIAN SHAW

"HIGH RISE" - HAWKWIND

"LADIES OF THE ROAD" - KING CRIMSON

"FAITH HEALER" - SENSATIONAL ALEX HARVEY BAND

"THERE'S A MAN" - INCREDIBLE HOG

"GOIN' DOWN (FOR THE THIRD TIME)" - STARS

(*)"OF THEE I SING" - LEON RUSSELL

(*)"GIMME SHELTER" - MERRY CLAYTON

"SOUL SURVIVOR / SISTER MORPHINE" - THE ROLLING STONES

"A GALLON OF GAS" - THE KINKS (LIVE)

"VENUS" - THE SHOCKING BLUE (LIVE)

"BACK TO THE FARM" - KINGDOM

(*)"I'M THE SLIME" - FRANK ZAPPA

(*)"MASTERS OF WAR" - BOB DYLAN

"WHISKEY WOMAN" - JUKIN' BONE

"THE SON OF JESUS" - JEFFERSON AIRPLANE

"I WANT TO SEE ANOTHER WORLD" - JEFFERSON STARSHIP

"FUNKY #7" - HOT TUNA

"HEARTBEAT" - HUMBLE PIE

"IF I COULD FLY" - AZTERIX

"RIDE IN THE SKY / TOXIC SHADOWS" - LUCIFER'S FRIEND

"NATURAL SCIENCE" - RUSH (LIVE)

...THERE IT IS. ANOTHER EDITION OF SPAC
(*) denotes request / dedication


PEACE
ॐ Jimi The Hippie ॐ

Festive Litha

LITHA (Summer Solstice, June 20-23, dependent on actual astronomical event)

Held on the longest day of the year, the Solstice is the celebration of lights triumph over darkness and that of the bountiful beauty that light brings into life. Flowers are common in the circle, roses and bright cheerful wildflowers are upon the altar and usually worn by all. It is the changing point of the year, and the celebration of the spiral dance of the year is common among Wiccans. It a celebration with much joy, and much feasting. Many Wiccans will attire themselves in bright colours and equally bright adornments of flowers. Usual food fare may include honeycakes or cornbread. Litha is not celebrated by all sects nor in the same way.

We celebrated Midsummer Day (St John's Eve) yesterday at Columcille.

It was a grand occasion with all the stops pulled out. I wish I had brought my camera along - there were so many colorful people there.

First off, let me tell you how hard it is to convince an ex-Priest that he would have a ton of fun at a Pagan Solstice Festival... LOL.

Finally, he went for it and we got there a bit late - just in time to see NNDT.

My favorite performance of the day would be hard to pick...

• Native Nations Dance Theater was pretty awesome.

Delwin played the flute at the top of the mountain. (pictured above left) Man, it sounded incredible. It brought the whole vibe together.

I wish my Son would have been able to come along so he could have seen some of his heritage in action. The Hoop Dance was very involved and totally inspiring and also Drew's Prairie Chicken Dance (pictured on the right). This performance lit the flame of the Solstice for me.

The Lady who narrated (I think her name was Vaughnda) was very keen to present a concise history of the dances and what they represented. It was marvelous.

• Vicki Doney — Her beautiful voice followed us through the park as we left the circle of stones to explore the wondrous nature of the park at the edge of the Appalachian Trail...

• Next up was Circle of Stones Ritual Theater - also truly awesome.

• Jack McGavin did his two-tone chanting with the shruti box while I meditated - Butch thought I was crazy, but I didn't care. ;o)

The day was magical - especially in the beautiful setting of Columcille. Butch and I wandered off a few times to visit the megalith formations. I thought of Sister Sorrow as I walked the Labyrinth.

I'll make my way back up there again soon and take some pictures...

Happy Jāņi Everyone.

शांति
इंद्रधनु राक्षस


Link: Pocono Record Article - Celebrating Summer
**note: If you read the comments in the newspaper article, it will remind you that some people are just never satisfied unless they can feel superior to others.

...some Hippy Music

Peace, Pot & Microdot

Tradition

Last night I went berserk and shaved my head again this year for the summer. What a clean fresh feeling, but sometimes at night it gets cold... (LOL) so I wear a nightcap after drinking one.

This was a tradition that started back in '95 with the passing of Jerry Garcia. He was always like a member of the family to me, and after the countless Grateful Dead Concerts I'd seen over the years - it was like the passing of an era... I am glad that THE DEAD have finally picked up the banner again, but I'll never forget the Jerry Era...

When I'd heard of Jerry's Death, I was deeply saddened and - I'd gone to the bar and had a countless number of shots of Old Grand Dad in his honor. When I got home after that (about 3am, a bit sloppy) I decided to shave my long hair... with a straight razor! Never do that! My dark red curly hair was almost waist length at that time (August 1995).

The next day, the bathroom was full of blood and hair - and I couldn't remember much - until I touched my head... LOL. My poor Grandmother didn't know what the hell happened - and she was worried. Man did she laugh at me after I showed her my naked skull... She called me "Baldy Sours". I always wear a bandana, and the first time I put it on afterwards it felt pretty strange.



Now "the shaving" has kind of become a tradition, except that I've moved it to the end of spring... Go Ahead - Have a laugh.

I still miss my Jerry...

The following quote is from "SKELETON KEY":

"To be a Deadhead is to live at the boundaries of social convention, and the status of homosexuals in American culture has likewise been that of outlaws. Both Deadheads and queers assert the sovereignty of the individual over society's idea of what it means to be a man or woman, and both are privy to insights about oneself as an evolving spiritual being that come only from viewing one's own culture from the *outside in.* The values which appear fixed and rigid to an unquestioning member of the mainstream culture appear fixed and relative to an outsider. In the instant of seizing the opportunity for personal autonomy, growth, and self- exploration, Deadheads and queers share the transcendent experience of "being in the world but not of it."

-- from 'Skeleton Key/A Dictionary for Deadheads' by David Shenk and Steve Silberman

...Now, if you're a queer deadhead like me - that's two strikes... PAGAN makes three. I guess I'm "OUT" ;o)

From A Spo Meme: A Short, Personal History of Blogging

My blog bud, Ur-Spo (who I had originally seen over at Daniel's Reality and Presence would have to fall under the category of "Our Mutual Friend" [more later*] he just enticed me) ... has an interesting post up about blogging. (go read it) I have chosen to respond here because I do love to give endorsements to the blogs I love to read.

He gives 5 Categories...

1) The first blog

I had ever followed was Where Is Raed? by Salam Pax - a gay Iraqi. I used to get so caught up in worrying about him between posts. He is a lover, not a fighter - but in saying that, I've come to realize that he is one of the biggest fighters of all time - fighting for human rights - living the cause day to day in his war-torn country... Thanks to BU$HCO. He was the one who first got me thinking that I might try my hand at it, and of course many of you now know that =CoffeeHouseStudio= was my attempt.

2) "FATE"

My second category (as chronologically - that's how I started blogging) would have to be "FATE" as I went scurrying about in the Blog-o-sphere... I stumbled upon the now defunct PBA (Progressive Blog Alliance) in the early days and joined. Many of the other authors there were politically open-minded and liberal, but not of the same "sexual persuasion" as myself with a few exceptions. I made quite a few cyber-friends there over the years.

• Cul @ Ratboy's Anvil has grown to be a very close friend from those early days. It's funny, he probably knows more about me than my own partner does.

• Jim @ Mockingbird's Medley has recently put his blog on hiatus. He was kind enough to let me co-author over there from time to time.

• Doug Ireland @ Direland was also an early friend. This man is amazing. He writes about global human rights issues from the homsexual viewpoint. From him I learned many injustices in the world that happen against the LGBT community.

• Natalie @ All Facts & Opinions, Another Early Friend in the many causes we've tried to advance - politically over the years. She is of a like mind - even in the music. (I'm not your typically gay taste in music... I like about anything if it's done well). Every Song Is A Voice.

• Michael Hawkins @ Spontaneous Arising has also been a good friend, offering much needed spiritual support from time to time.

There are many more examples and if I left anyone out, I'm sorry... This one's off the cuff.

3) Our Mutual Friend

*Urs fits into this one for me, as I've said before. I saw a few comments he left over at Daniel's (which was then "The Guy In The Dessert" ) who I happened to meet through "A Big Fat Slob" - who I happened to meet through Rick @ Homo Superior...

4) Reciprocal

I had been blogging quite a while before I'd ever gotten a comment... I wasn't very interesting back in those days (still not ;o)) ... but
One of my best friends, One that has sent me "goodies" in the mail - and TONS of spiritual support is my awesome Sister Sorrow @ Walking The Labrynth Of Life. I first remember her leaving a comment on a post I had over at the =CoffeeHouse= about the Icelandic Peace Tower for John Lennon. We've been close ever since.

Pax Romano @ Pax Romano's Ramblings is another truly awesome friend. Always lending support and good vibes, his blog is a daily read. After I get my coffee in the morning - his site is usually the first place I stop on the web. He always makes me laugh. I could see us palling around the Mall.
It's funny... he refers to his partner as "Whatshisname" - and Urs calls his S.O. "Someone".
I simply call mine "Butch" (sometimes I change the 'u' for an 'i')

Christopher @ From The Left (What a Hunk!) His politics are about the same as mine. He and his partner may be relocating to Portland Oregon soon. I wish them well.

5) "Caught My Eye" Blogs... Tons...

Here are a few:

• Jockohomo

• City Woof (WOOF!!!)

• Joe.My.God

• The Life Of Pinky Bear

• Ashram At Pooh Corner

and so on and so on and so on... Hope the post isn't too tedious. Go check them out, you won't be disappointed.

Sorrow Brought Sunshine Today...

I got up in my usual grumpy mood... and then the coffee... That always makes me feel better. Went out to the garden to sow a few plants in the dappled morning sun...

Came back in to check the PC, and lo and behold - one of my favorite bloggers is shutting down his site today. Mockingbird's Medley is ending it's sweet song after 4 years of highly intelligent and acutely relevant political musing - which is a sad note to this rainbow soldier... Jim's always been a friend when I was down, and I suppose we'll still debate even after this; but losing a fellow site is always a sad story. I know nothing lasts forever and all that, but... still.

I went out to my mailbox, and there it was. A little square package of Sunshine from Virginia... I opened the parcel with glee. inside was this small note:

Jimi my friend
I had a little bird tell me you needed some joy today, so I am sending along a care package.
Full of care..
~laugh~
some food for the body, I can never get enough ginger...
some tea for the spirit and some tunes for the soul.
The pottery is experiments, learning curves I don't feel are there yet, but still have my heart in them, so I can't sell them, but I can give them with love...
to you...
Be peace my friend
and know even the smallest act of kindness spirals outward into the world.
I have been blessed by the rainbow of your life
blessings in abundance
Sister Sorrow

...After I dried the tears, the first thing I did was open the ginger ~lips smacking~ and have some - thinking of my Sister, and what an awesome person she is - and how blessed I am to have found someone like her out here in this ridiculously hard-assed world.

The tea is awesome. I love "Sorrow's Red Mix"... I wish I knew how to read tea leaves - but all I know is that they were dancing the happy dance to the CD she made me. Awesome music, and I'll play a few this Friday on the air.

The mug and candle are on the shelf right now, until later this afternoon when I will put them to good use with another mug o'Sorrow's Red Mix and a blessing.

You've given this old curmudgeonly hippy a real reason for joy. I can't express the way I feel in words. Rekindling faith in human kindness is an invaluable solemnity. Thank you is never enough. I was before, but I really am a believer in Karma now.

Peace Love & Light,
ॐ Jimi The Hippie ॐ

Joyous Bealtaine

May day! Delightful day!

Bright colours play the vale along.
Now wakes at morning's slender ray
Wild and gay the blackbird's song.

Now comes the bird of dusty hue,
The loud cuckoo, the summer-lover;
Branchy trees are thick with leaves;
The bitter, evil time is over…

Loaded bees with puny power
Goodly flower-harvest win;
Cattle roam with muddy flanks;
Busy ants go out and in.

Through the wild harp of the wood
Making music roars the gale --
Now it settles without motion,
On the ocean sleeps the sail.

Men grow mighty in the May,
Proud and gay the maidens grow;
Fair is every wooded heights;
Fair and bright the plain below…

Loudly carols the lark on high,
Small and shy his tireless lay,
Singing in wildest, merriest mood,
Delicate-hued, delightful May.
Irish 9th century

LSD Creator Passes From Earthly Plane

AP
Swiss chemist Albert Hofmann discovered LSD in 1938

(FILES) This undated handout file picture released by Novartis laboratories shows scientist Dr Albert Hofmann showing a model of the LSD molecule. Swiss authorities said on April 30, 2008 that Hofmann, the Swiss chemist who discovered the now-banned hallucinogenic drug LSD that was an icon of the Hippy movement, has died at the age of 102.

NEW YORK - Albert Hofmann, the father of the mind-altering drug LSD whose medical discovery grew into a notorious "problem child," died Tuesday. He was 102.

Hofmann died of a heart attack at his home in Basel, Switzerland, according to Rick Doblin, president of the Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies, in a statement posted on the association's Web site.

Hofmann's hallucinogen inspired — and arguably corrupted — millions in the 1960's hippy generation. For decades after LSD was banned in the late 1960s, Hofmann defended his invention.

"I produced the substance as a medicine ... It's not my fault if people abused it," he once said.

The Swiss chemist discovered lysergic acid diethylamide-25 in 1938 while studying the medicinal uses of a fungus found on wheat and other grains at the Sandoz pharmaceuticals firm in Basel.

He became the first human guinea pig of the drug when a tiny amount of the substance seeped on to his finger during a repeat of the laboratory experiment on April 16, 1943.

"I had to leave work for home because I was suddenly hit by a sudden feeling of unease and mild dizziness," he subsequently wrote in a memo to company bosses.

"Everything I saw was distorted as in a warped mirror," he said, describing his bicycle ride home. "I had the impression I was rooted to the spot. But my assistant told me we were actually going very fast."

Image by ddaa via FlickrOne trip leads to another
Three days later, Hofmann experimented with a larger dose. The result was a horror trip.

"The substance which I wanted to experiment with took over me. I was filled with an overwhelming fear that I would go crazy. I was transported to a different world, a different time," Hofmann wrote.

There was no answer at Hofmann's home on Tuesday and a person who answered the phone at Novartis, a former employer, said the company had no knowledge of his death.

Hofmann and his scientific colleagues hoped that LSD would make an important contribution to psychiatric research. The drug exaggerated inner problems and conflicts and thus it was hoped that it might be used to recognize and treat mental illness like schizophrenia.

For a time, Sandoz sold LSD 25 under the name Delysid, encouraging doctors to try it themselves. It was one of the strongest drugs in medicine — with just one gram enough to drug an estimated 10,000 to 20,000 people for 12 hours.

Hofmann discovered the drug had a similar chemical structure to psychedelic mushrooms and herbs used in religious ceremonies by Mexican Indians.

Symbol of the '60s
LSD was elevated to international fame in the late 1950s and 1960s thanks to Harvard professor Timothy Leary who embraced the drug under the slogan "turn on, tune in, drop out." The film star Cary Grant and numerous rock musicians extolled its virtues in achieving true self discovery and enlightenment.

But away from the psychedelic trips and flower children, horror stories emerged about people going on murder sprees or jumping out of windows while hallucinating. Heavy users suffered permanent psychological damage.

The U.S. government banned LSD in 1966 and other countries followed suit.

Hofmann maintained this was unfair, arguing that the drug was not addictive. He repeatedly maintained the ban should be lifted to allow LSD to be used in medical research.

‘My problem child’
He himself took the drug — purportedly on an occasional basis and out of scientific interest — for several decades.

"LSD can help open your eyes," he once said. "But there are other ways — meditation, dance, music, fasting."

Even so, the self described "father" of LSD readily agreed that the drug was dangerous if in the wrong hands. This was reflected by the title of his 1979 book: "LSD - my problem child."

इम्पोस्सिब्ली Impossibly त्रिंगुलातेद Triangulated तवो त्रिनितिएस

.................................................

Open Your Mind

Can you see through the veil of perceived moralities?

What is the truth for you?
Believing things just because your society says they're right, is not always the truth. I know - I've had my eyes opened many times recently to what is and what should never be. Then there is always what should be and is not.

I've always believed that if you love someone - really love them - that is enough. This may not be the case for everyone. Is it possible to love more than one person at a time? I believe so. We may not necessarily be exclusively singularly attachable...

I may be the odd man out on this but, I know I have so much to give - and if the "one" I chose doesn't want it... well... I've been searching all my life. Guess it never really ends until it does.

Possibilities are open. Every person is not cut from the same mold. You may not have the right to judge another about how they want to live their lives... No harm done, but being truthful about it can bring consequences you were not willing to gamble on. Err on the side of caution, Human.

"Understanding is a virtue - hard to come by.
You can teach me how to Love if you only try.
So please - Don't give up so soon..."

Obama - Vision

Lots more at the HVW8 site. Make sure you visit.

Image by Dan Buller with help from Ty G.
Used with permission. Thanks Dan.




Free Download:
Original Mix by =Rainbow Demon= (9/2004)
"Submission Accomplished"
from "Dangerous Nonsense" - Space City Rock
18.59 MB | 15:11 minutes... .ogg vorbis (VBR)

Don't be shy - Let me know what you think of the mix.
Leave a comment...

OM For Sister Sorrow: मो ॐ

I have to say Thank You, and Thank You also to my Lovely Lady Patron Saint.
It means so much more than words could say.

Happy VD

My Refrigerator door has a tiny little Heart on it from someone special.

Thank You.

Bless Dick Blick

I finally got two brand new canvases on sale.
40% off is a pretty big savings. Thank you Dick... Wish I had a bunch more money.

There was this cute little cashier wearing a Pink Floyd 'Dark Side Of The Moon' T shirt, that took care of me - trotting around the store in front of me showing me anything that I'd mention.

What service! And with a huge engaging smile that was truly genuine. He certainly filled my 'eye candy' quotient for the day! We talked for about 25 minutes.



Don't ever let this old Hippie walk into an art store alone. I want to have so many things (besides that cashier - woof! - he was a bit young for my taste tho). Spent an hour "longing" for the things I'd never be able to afford. As it was I spent well over $100 that I don't really have for such luxuries...

Besides the canvases, I got a small set of colour shapers, a huge tube of alizarin crimson oil paint and some quick drying agent for oil paint. I was eying up some new paint knives, but I couldn't afford them. One of the knives I wanted was $35, which of course I didn't have. I'll just have to re-invent a new use for something around here instead...

Now to get my ass off this chair and into my ice cold studio to choose where to start...

द्रगोंस्ब्लूद (sangre de draco)

According to the "Wiki"...

In American Hoodoo, African-American folk magic, and New Orleans voodoo, Dragon's Blood is used in mojo hands for money-drawing or love-drawing, and is used as incense to cleanse a space of negative entities or influences. It is also added to red ink to make "Dragon's Blood Ink", which is used to inscribe magical seals and talismans.


"Dragon's Blood" detail from "1st National Bicentennial" (July 4, 1976).

Dragon's blood (Daemonorops) was used for ceremonies in India. Sometimes Dracaena resin, but more often Daemonorops resin, was used in China as red varnish for wooden furniture. It was also used to colour the surface of writing paper for banners and posters, used especially for weddings and for Chinese New Year.

Dragon's blood of both Dracaena draco and Dracaena cinnabari were used as a source of varnish for 18th century Italian violinmakers. There was also an 18th century recipe for toothpaste that contained dragon's blood. In modern times it is still used as a varnish for violins, in photoengraving, as an incense resin, and as a body oil.

In folk medicine, dragon's blood is used externally as a wash to promote healing of wounds and to stop bleeding. It is used internally for chest pains, post-partum bleeding, internal traumas and menstrual irregularities. In neopagan Witchcraft, it is used to increase the potency of spells for protection, love, banishing and sexuality. In New Age shamanism it is used in ceremonies in a similar way as the neopagans use it.

(original music 1998)
Download in .OGG format
(it should play on your mp3 player)

Space City Rock: "Dragons In The Dungeon"

a) Crystal Forest
b) Avatar Awakens
c) Vizier's March
d) The Conjuring
e) Dragon's Breath
f) Jason's Lament
g) Epilogue

Time - 18:10 | 23.71 MB

Dragon's Blood was used in this original drawing, and I'm boiling some right now in the mini cauldron. It's a fabulous 'clean' scent, and I highly recommend its use.

Wanting...Waiting...Watching... Mass Debating

Searching for a sign
Solo Sentenced - Silent
Secluded and Shamefully Deluded

Why won't You be there for Me?
Gambling on a Dream and Running on no Steam.
No White Knight / Black Steed, What's only left to Bleed Blue.
You - the ONE - The Only? For me... You Have Read Me.



To be without - a painful Stake
In the Heart of Destiny - it Breaks.
Coloured by ulterior incitement broiling
Hot Grills of mounting Questions spoiling.

Again Anointed and with Anonymous Approval Awaiting
The Portent from another Time revisits - skating - past...
Passed beyond the Now - and Zen of Nothing - to hold
And no one to hold on.
Bereft.

Keeping sakes of last burgeoned Romance - lasting not
'Til Forever and a Day - comes Throttle full on - in time
To envision dropping Bombs from Astral Planes of Hate
Relate Conflection at an inner State
Start another Round.
Debate.

Sevenseal

Without the Future - there is no Past...
Present in Focus will be our Last.


So, what to do with all this?
Channeled into the works. There's got to be a way of finally releasing it back to where it came from. It's simply not a good thing keeping it bottled up all these years. The energies have to go somewhere.

Caught on canvas. Like Cthulhu'Thulhu or Yog-Sothoth, rendered harmless - but retaining the power inertly. Never to do harm again, but good instead.


above image courtesy of King Crimson

I saw three Hawks & four Crows yesterday on the path. 3 Hawks with 4 Crows is a sign for me - an omen. If others can do it to music, so I will attempt by image.

THIS SEE OF CHANGES

As years go on - and beauty fades
We wonder
Why we were put here in the first place?

The way we were becomes a faded moment in time.
The way we are is but a fleeting moment.
...and who knows how or even if we will be...

Seize this Moment
Love the Close Ones
on and on it flows
Into Blackness
Everlasting
'til Seed Eternal Grows.

Andy: My Version...

Andy was a Big Burly Biker.
Someone you'd never want to Fuck with - let alone meet alone in a dark alley...

He was also one of my best friends. I loved him. When he was in the bar, I knew nobody would give me any shit - because Andy always took care of it. He seemed very gruff to most all people, but with me he was a Teddy Bear. He'd always come to me for doctoring after the brawl. I think I may have saved him from stitches more than once.

I took the time to understand him. (he had a Polish-Gypsy accent) He was never very complicated, but I always listened to his story. I don't think he had anyone else - a Loner - kind of like me.



Why he chose me, I'll never know - but I was glad he did. He 'kidnapped' me (his words) one time after I'd had a horrible night tending bar at the strip joint, and we rode away on his Harley. We spent 3 days away on the road and in the mountains. I was in heaven - and Andy was very HOT in the lone sleeping bag we had to share. (I guess I have a thing for sleeping bags and rough tuff guys...) But, I will always remember his tenderness, because he was such a brute of a macho man to everyone else.

With me he was totally different. He let himself go. I guess he was, with me - what he thought he could never let the world know, outside us.

We would each have a hand tattooed and be branded on the chest with the Ankh, as a way of remembering our closeness. (besides being blood-brothers) It just fucking pisses me off when I lose people like this... I know I was cursed by Drew (he was a warlock), but he could never steal what Andy and I shared.

Drew had given me a cursed Seal of Solomon, and I made the mistake of trusting him and wearing it for a time. I think I still have some traces of bad karma lingering from this even today. You see, the lady Drew was interested in, was interested in me... and he pretended to be a friend. When we were alone one night she begged me not to let him take her. She was so afraid of Drew she was shaking as she talked between the tears. I was already wearing the seal when I found all this out... Too late.



Much too soon afterwards, Andy was killed in a tragic motorcycle accident (1978). He wasn't supposed to die just yet. (I'm sure some of you know what I mean...) The circumstances were very sketchy. Coincidence? I think not. The story continues beyond even this, but I won't relate it here.

I still miss Andy's rugged ways and the protection and love he harboured for me... He was my champion.

Here's to you, My Brother.
How I'm still here is anybody's guess...
I suppose I have the stories to tell.

TRUE COLOURS

An art project for class Studio 101.
I was lucky to have a teacher like Olaf Zeidenberg, from Germany's Bauhaus - and originally from Estonia Lithuania. (We used to kid him about jumping over the Berlin Wall and taking a bullet in the ass on the way)...

And so, we were given the assignment to do a self portrait in any medium.

Of course, I couldn't decide, so I did a mixed media drawing on canvas complete with pencil (graphite, colored & grease), conté crayon, and india ink. A strange combination I thought, but then again it was 1972, and I was only 17... what the hell did I know? (I also did a matching portrait of Alfonso, but I gave that to him years ago)

The drawings of Fons & I were stylized in an Egyptian fashion, but on canvas instead of papyrus. I had a huge red afro then, and Alfons used to kid me and call it an Iro (because I'm mostly Irish). Other nicknames ensued, such as Brillo & Beatnik. (and a few others I won't mention)...

The birth of a new Dharma Bum...



Another poem...
I had written this one after I had learned of Fonso's Death. Writing through tears throughout my life was to become the bastion that protected my soul.

"DARKNESS, LIGHTLY"

Topsy-turvy, whirling dervish:
LIFE comes crashing down,
In amidst our little worlds...
While REALITY, the Clown; goes
Dancing wildly through the crowd
Touching each and every heart
With grimacing appeal and fear
Our SPIRITS shrink and grow.
Until CONFUSION sinks the FIBER-BEING
Of self-collective mind.


DEATH, the MIGHTY MASTER
Secret sleeps inside our time...
Wakens instant insane & claims
His everlasting PRIZE.