Little Changes: Life Goes On

I've always been notoriously bad at tests...

As I went out to my truck to leave for an audition yesterday, I ran across a dead hawk at the driver's door. I didn't know what to make of this as a premonition - but it kind of unnerved me. I tried to spin it in a positive way, but the more I thought about it - the more it seemed like a serious presage to failure. I put a quart of oil in the old truck and took off over the mountain trying not to think about it...

I was a bit early, so I walked around the next mountain a bit, trying to calm down. It was a beautiful day, I thought - things will be alright. I was pretty anxious to get started.

I was to cook a meal for four. One stipulation being not to cook pork. The amuse-bouche I made was shrimp toast with shredded ham and feta - what an ass! Oh well... I never even thought about it until an hour after I had left the premises. Perhaps if I hadn't been preoccupied...

Dinner consisted of chicken and shrimp in vodka infused marinara cream tossed with overcooked penne - and two perfectly seared strip steaks rubbed with my infamous "brokeback mountain" seasoning (coffee, brown sugar & Kosher salt). The sauce I made for the steaks was supposed to have whiskey, but I was rushed for time and couldn't prepare it properly. The new potatoes I made for the steaks were nearly burned, but I like them with a crunchy crust...

I also prepared a proposal for a fall menu which I gave the waitress - for the table to look at - and got no feedback from it. I was dismissed with the statement that I would hear the outcome on Wednesday...

I suppose I failed miserably - I'll know tomorrow for sure - but if things go the way I feel they did - there's no need to wait until tomorrow to know the outcome.

When I got home, that hawk was still there, so I quietly disposed of the poor creature so the kids wouldn't get to it. I felt pretty badly about the whole misadventure.

This was the job that I really wanted to procure. It would have been a great thing for me - and maybe I'm giving up too soon, but I think I know how to read it... I'm feeling pretty low right about now.